Even selfish at times. First, my dad was a wonderful husband to my mother the greatest mom on earthand a wonderful father to me. She cried when you proclaimed your love of goodness because, in part, it was a sign that you weren't broken and desperate for Mormonism.
I don't think you "dodged a bullet" but I do think new residents change Other wives told me my husband would "come back" but we are still in the training so I can't tell you whether that is completely true or not.
If she can't put you before her religion then you need to walk away.